Episode 302: Super Sausage Fest
on December 4, 2014
and modified on July 6, 2018.
So it’s Gyno-Star’s first day on her new team… and first days are always a little awkward.
Thanks Nick Marino for the title suggestion! And as always, thanks to my Patrons on Patreon, who are making regular updates possible.
Sometimes a guy with a mask with a giant face penis is just a giant face penis?
One pain of childbirth power demonstration, coming up!
“Agree with me or i will hurt you” – nice logic there.
Try to understand: it’s a comic strip. Please try.
What do you mean? They asked what her powers are, and Bird Brain seems intent on volunteering.
So we got a clear Hawkman expy and Aquaman expy.
mr. Red and Blue is propably a superman expy.
What of the fat army dude? “Captain” America expy? Not sure what ranks those stripes are for.
Somewhere between Cpt. America and Sgt. Slaughter, I’d wager.
Possibly with a little Sgt. Hatred mixed in, depending on Rebecca’s viewing tastes.
The Corpulent Corporal?
That’s pretty good… and close.
Lance-Corporal Corpulence?
Major Girth?
That is an impressive “hair flip” on Sea Man there.
He has to have all the best products, salt water is murder on hair.
It’s one of his superpowers, obvi.
How can these morons have invited her to be a member and NOT know about her powers? Wait, maybe I just answered my own question.
Let the ridiculousness begin! I can’t wait for them to “teach” her about why kicking a man riiight where it hurts is wrong. I know it seems odd to bring up, but it’s one of those things that people have always told me, in a patronizing tone, and how there are “better” ways to take down someone.
During the L.A. riots, cops found that looters dropped their weapons more quickly when cops pointed their guns at their crotches rather than their heads. Do you think anybody told the cops there were “better” ways of dealing with perpetrators?
Wrong? No. Stupid and dangerous? Yeah.
If you try it and he doesn’t go down you’re in deep shiz. Brain turns off and all you have left is pain and adrenaline.
Uh, yeah, exactly. If there’s a guy you need to take down for some reason, you’re much better off NOT kicking him in the nuts. It’s much smarter and less dangerous to… do something else I guess? Ask nicely?
Hit him in one the several other soft parts of the human body instead of the one that may result in him going Hulk instead of falling down?
Gods have mercy if the man threatening you is wearing a cup. Apparently the only option left will be to stand there looking vaguely confused.
Thug: “GIMME YOUR MONEY B***H!”
Lady: “Please don’t hur- GOTCHA! FIELD GOAL!” *THWACK!*
Thug: “Geez! That would have really hurt if I wasn’t wearing this jock”
Lady: *THWACK!*
Thug: “I said I’m wearing a cup”
Lady: *THWACK!*
Thug: “That doesn’t hurt lady”
Lady: *THWACK!* *THWACK!*
Thug: “Stop it”
Lady: *THWACK!*
Thug: “This is just embarrassing now”
Lady: *THWACK!* *THWACK!* *THWACKITTY-THWACK!*
Thug: “. . . just keep your money.”
*insert victory music*
I don’t understand this trolling. It’s a bad idea to kick a guy in the nuts because he might be wearing a cup? Is that some kind of satire? Are you doing a parody of the kind of devil’s advocate contrarian who tries to provoke feminists into a tizzy or something? I think that’s what it must be. You’re a parody account. Well done, sir or madam. Well done.
What an entirely reasonable way to interpret what she said! Clearly, a writer and artist who has written many fight scenes in which a woman has used other moves against men than kicking them in the crotch must have been confessing that she is incapable of thinking of other possible responses and would always do that even in unusual circumstances where she knew would not work. That’s the only thing she could possibly have meant!
So, while a kick to the balls will turn a man into hulk, a fist to the throat will leave him peaceful like a lamb even if it fails to seriously harm him? I doubt it.
There are no hard and fast rules on when it’s appropriate to hit somebody in any given location, but “going for maximum pain” isn’t necessarily the best self-defence tactic, especially if it involves escalation of the confrontation (if someone’s merely pushing you around, slapping you in the face etc). And even if you’re going down the route of inflicting a significant amount of pain then something more disabling of the opponent’s senses, e.g. pepper spray to the eyes, may be a better bet.
On the whole I see a 4 tier principle to confrontation:
Tier 1: Calm, even friendly disagreement
Tier 2: Shouting, verbal abuse, etc.
Tier 3: Suppressive, non-lethal, generally unarmed violence
Tier 4: Lethal, generally armed violence
Most people will not, by instinct, escalate from one tier to another, and it’s a dangerous thing for anyone to do. There’s also a moral duty and practical logic to de-escalation whenever possible.
But there’s also a gradation within tiers, and when you get close to the top of one tier, it’s easier to push someone else into the next tier… and high tier 3 stuff, like ball-crushing, bone-breaking or eye-gouging is very dangerous territory to be getting into. Especially as it doesn’t necessarily disable an opponent. http://www.antimusic.com/news/14/December/03Metal_Star_Ruptures_Testicle_In_Stage_Mishap.shtml
What you don’t realize is that a man who attacks a woman with physical violence before she does, is in your Tier 4, always. This means she should fight to survive. That is the most sensible thing to do. Non-lethal violence is for people who are stronger than their opponent, which women are often not if attacked by a man.
I seriously doubt that fingers in his eyes or a fist on his throat will, if they fail to disable him, make a man less aggressive than a kick to the balls. Trying to not-kill someone costs valuable energy. I don’t think a woman who is attacked by a rapist has any responsibility to spare his life.
I think Paddy is describing the reasonable force doctrine, without using the exact same terms? If so, then most people can probably agree that deadly force is reasonable to defend against rape, but one person can’t just murder another over a slap to the face, regardless of the gender of either party.
Pretty much, although I haven’t read up on that doctrine so much myself.
I thought it was clear we’re specifically talking about “ways to take someone down.”
I thought you do too.. However, the kick to the balls is a myth.
While it works very well on young boys, that is because they reproductive system isn’t mature enough to take it, also, children have a lower pain-threshold.
While we’re at it, Men also have a version of PMS. We just usually just don’t associate the symptoms with the right thing, ‘I’m just moody sometimes/must have strained something’.
Don’t forget, PMS was discovered in the 20th century. Nuns at least would have figured it out if it was that crippling as popular culture would have us believe. Until the 20th century, women did exactly as men, then it was discovered, so they no longer filter it out.
Have you ever been kicked in the sack? I have, and I was out of the fight. I am a fairly physically tough guy, and while I don’t represent all men, a kick to the nuts is a good way to take a man down.
Seems like Gynostar is going to have to fight misogyny everywhere it exists- and personally, I think those two guys are officially on the “bad guy” list now…
Whoa, slow down there. Let’s try talking them down first. THEN we can bring in the heavy artillery.
well…given how I feel towards men most of the time, I tend to skip right to the light artillery…
But that’s me.
I, too, have noticed a theme amongst women with superpowers.
Amongst…may not be the correct word. Damned if I can find the right one though.
That ‘hawkman’ outfit. Pass me my extra strength sunglasses and some brain bleach, please.
Scoff not at the mighty nipples of justice!
The mighty nipples of justice I can cope with – it’s the attire covering the rest of him that’s making my eyes bleed. It’s like the unholy offspring of ‘classical’ art attire and WWE, culminating in that plague doctor/masquerade mask abomination.
This is why he thinks Gynostar hypnotizes men with her powers of seduction – he does the same with women using his mighty nipples of justice. (And if that doesn’t work he makes their eyes bleed with the rest of his outfit)
No sexism here – he is just trying to find out if he finally has a colleague who will not make fun of his superpowers.
I really like this head canon.
I’m…honestly not sure what this is supposed to be referencing. The ‘Big two’ superhero teams, Avengers and Justice League both had female founding members…and neither one of them was really on the stereotypically girly power front (Wasp is a bit more…but I’m not really sure that ‘Shrinking’ and ‘energy blasts’ are stereotypically female powers).
…heck, the big healers in Marvel are Angel and Elixer. Both men. And the Aquaman parody has no room to talk. He’s got empathic powers with sea life.
This comic, no insult intended, really seems to fall flat due to not really making much sense.
I think Rebecca is going after the Smurfette Principle. Carrying on the joke from last strip: superhero teams usually have just one token woman, who right now is Gyno-star. It would probably be a better parody of the source material if the previous token woman had just left, so the boys decided they needed some woman, any woman, to replace her and didn’t bother to do any research.
I agree: women whose only power is healing seems to be a thing from Fantasy, and more specifically JRPGs. Women whose power is empathy? I think first of Deanna Troi. Saturn Girl and Marvel Girl come closest in the comics, but they had powers well beyond that.
Funny how you “aren’t sure what this comic is referencing”, then proceed to talk about the very issues this comic is referencing.
I don’t like explaining my jokes, because if they didn’t work for you they didn’t work for you. But I will say that I rarely if ever satirize specific heroes or teams. Although I do draw inspiration and sometimes make references to specific characters.
You don’t like to…but this time, could you? As this joke, as I said, is flying past me entirely as almost none of the dialogue seems to line up with comic book teams outside a few outlier cases.
It’s a joke about women in male-dominated work places.
“I’m not really sure that ‘Shrinking’ and ‘energy blasts’ are stereotypically female powers”
Shrinking? Size reduction dieting is definitely a sterotypical female power. “Energy blasts” is just a euphemism for hot flashes and PMS.
Angel and Elixir are the big healers because the American Medical Association was so male-dominated and influential. Ever since the male doctors ran the midwives out of business so the men could spread childbed fever on their unwashed hands, the cocky physicians gotta keep up those ‘high’ standards!
Last comic: “I smell incoming straw-men”
Called it!
Of course predicting the league would be a bunch of straw-men is like “calling” a sunrise but I’ll take my victories where I can.
Can’t wait to hear what the overweight military hero in the corner has to say. Bet he’ll be extra strawy if he isn’t set dressing.
Probably about “hurr durr women shouldn’t be in the military” and of course his voice will be made extra derpy because …reasons.
Please crayven, you already admitted that you would totally act like that guy, so don’t caim he’s a strawman now.
Strawmen, by definition, are people that are more stupid than the real life version of what they are representing. Which is hardly possible with sexists, anyway.
See above for my charitable interpretation of his motives … and no, flirting with a new colleague is NOT polite. Neither is it professional.
Ah, but anyone in the comic who deserves what he gets is a “strawman,” and if anyone doesn’t, that’s “hypocrisy.” Thus, haters gonna hate.
Sure, in panels 2, 3, and 4 the dialog is pretty funny. But while reading *panel 1* I didn’t laugh even once.
Also, while doing your parody you didn’t do precise trademark violations, so I’m pretty sure your comic doesn’t make any sense.
Good Lord! Caution hypocrisy and double standards ahead.
Calling it now: the people who hate every Gynostar comic are going to hate the next Gynostar comic. Specifically, the next person the main character argues with will either clearly be in the wrong, thus a “straw man,” or not clearly be in the wrong, thus “double standards.”
A quick note about comments: Please remember that Gynostar.com is my own site. I pay for the hosting and I create the primary content. I’m under no obligation to allow anyone’s comments.
My choice of which comments to delete is strictly based on the desire to curate an enjoyable experience for readers. I’d rather that visitors to my site don’t experience that “Ugh, I shouldn’t have read the comments” feeling. So going forward, I’m going to do what I can to prevent that.
As I’ve said, I treat each comment on a case-by-case basis. If, in my opinion, you have something worthwhile to say — even if it’s critical of me or my work — I won’t delete it. I like lively discussion.
On the other hand, if your comment gets deleted, don’t worry: nobody is stopping you from posting your thoughts elsewhere. If it’s important to you that I read your criticism, you’re welcome to email me (gyno.star@yahoo.com). I might even respond.
Many thanks for reading, and special thanks to those who’ve taken the time to comment.
The “sausage fest” joke is a bit cissexist and transmisogynistic, as it equates “penis” with “male” and vice versa. I usually lurk, I’m just posting because I love this comic and am a little disappointed, especially given your previous stands against this kind of thing.
I hadn’t thought about it that way, but you make a good point. I’ll consider changing the title. Definitely open to suggestions for a new title if you have any.
All the men in the strip are cis, though, so I think it still works. But maybe, “Hall of Just Us?”
Ooh that’s pretty good.
I second “Hall of Just Us.” I definitely can’t think of a better one.
I can’t wait to see Gyno-Star fight Miss Gender, by the way! Especially what Little Sappho will have to say to her. If anyone was ever in need of some righteous lesbian anger, I tell you what.
I’d feel uncomfortable fighting female villains. But then, I guess I’d also feel uncomfortable fighting male ones.
It’s the fists, isn’t it? That’s my superhero weakness – fists to the body. Also weaponry of a technological or mystical nature. I’m unstoppable unless they have any of those things, though.
There was a Power Puff Girls episode like this. And they had them begging by the end to join and they said “no way.”
Given how her recent foray against “Not Alpha Male” went, I’d say her assertion is at best highly dubious.